Mom Talk

I was sitting on the couch visiting with one of my best friends (who is also my daughter’s babysitter for the two days a week I work) this afternoon after work.  Suddenly, my almost 4-year-old daughter comes flying into the room with her little friend (my friends’ 3-year-old) hot on her heels.  Lily (her friend) says, “She’s not gonna get on the top bunk of my bed,” and my daughter bursts into tears.  I have no idea what her problem is and being the rational person I am (haha) I started asking her to use her words to tell me why she was crying.  She said she couldn’t tell me and that Lily was mean.  I knew there was more to it but she wasn’t giving it up. 

We all questioned Lily as well but she seemed completely at a loss as to why her friend was crying like someone killed her dog or something.  Finally, my daughter yells out that Lily was in charge and she didn’t want her to be.  AHA!  So Lily bossed her and she didn’t like it.  That makes sense because my girl is bossy, too so I can see a problem but to cry like a banshee?  Holy Moly!  She told Lily she wasn’t going to be her friend anymore, a phrase that makes my blood boil.  My friend made Lily say she was sorry but we were not done yet.  I took my daughter back into the bedroom for some privacy and explained to her that it’s not okay to be mean to her friend.  They each pretend to be in charge at different times and she can’t always have her way.  I told her we were going to walk back out there and say to her friend, “I forgive you and I’m sorry, too.”  She freaked out and said she couldn’t say that, no way, I could tell her instead.  I told her if she didn’t do it, we were coming back in to the room and she was going to be disciplined, so she agreed to do it.  

We went up to Lily and she managed to choke the words out (with no small amount of glaring from me).  I ordered the two of them to hug and they did.  We then sat them down and explained (after the “you’re not my friend anymore” comment) that friends sometimes disagree and get angry with one another but that doesn’t mean they’re not still friends.  They can forgive each other and still have fun.

 By the time we left, the girls were back to normal but I gotta tell you, I was worn out.  Another story from Adventures in Parenting!!